Ready for a New Month

It is the end of February and I am glad. This month has not been a fun month for me. I have been a little lonely. I have been trying to do my best and give my all at my job, and when I get home from work I am tired. After making dinner I don't have much energy to do much else except read, watch T.V., or go to bed. It seems that the longer you go disconnected from community, the harder it is to see the importance of community. My problem is that ,outside of work, I don't 'feel' like trying to force friendships. I like for relationships to happen organically and on their own, but if I wait for them to happen organically I could be here for a while with no friends.

There is some good news. Slowly but surely I see the tide turning. I am coming out of this lonely and isolated funk. This past weekend Bruce and I made the trip down to Baton Rouge, LA to spend time with one of my friends from college and to meet her boyfriend. We all had a wonderful time. I was reminded how important an edifying and an encouraging community is. It was wonderful to be open and honest about struggles and successes and feel like I am not alone. I honestly believe one of the devil's many tactics is to isolate and make us feel alone in our troubles and in our sin. But we are not alone. I was reminded of that this weekend.

On the 7 hour drive home Bruce and I were able to have some good, but hard conversations about my feelings of loneliness. And when we were about an hour away from home a girl from my small group text me and asked me to grab breakfast Monday morning. It was exactly what I needed. God answered my prayers when I was even too stubborn to admit and say out loud that I am lonely and that I need help finding community. I am so thankful that God never gives up on me and he is always faithful.

My goal this week is to 'not waste my life.' Lately, I've been wasting so much time. Either on the Internet, Facebook, watching T.V., etc. I don't want to waste this precious time the Lord has given me. So I hope this week even when I'm tired and I don't want to work out, write a letter to a friend, spend time with Bruce, or get out of my comfort zone that I do it regardless of how tired I am. It feels good to blog again, and I'm glad I decided to write tonight. (Because I almost talked myself out of it because I am so tired!) I want to live each day for the Lord, and to be faithful in the life God has blessed me with.